Have you ever been the person in charge of planning an event? Perhaps you are planning a party or a vacation that is incredibly important to yourself or someone you love. How have you handled that responsibility? If you are a go-with-the-flow person you do not need to read any further. On the other hand, if you worry about the weather, the food, the location, the hotel and whether each person is going to have fun keep reading. This article offers ways to live more and worry less.
Enjoy the Moment
When I look back at some of the most important moments in my life I realize how I ruined them with worry. A prime example would be my wedding. I planned the fun right out of it. Worrying about every little detail was not something I could shake even in the middle of my vows. While most brides are thinking about the beauty of the vows, I was praying that the food would be good. Glen and I have been told that it is one of the best weddings our guests have ever been to. Sadly, what I remember most vividly was my persistent worrying. This used to be the way I handled everything. Any event was always impeccably planned and I was always a nervous wreck. It took me years to overcome this and sometimes it is still a challenge.
How to Live More and Worry Less
Trick number one, write down every worry that you can think of. Think about the things you typically worry about and get them out of your head. Your list should include everything, the weather, the food, the hotel, or even your dress could get stuck in your pantyhose (that is a story for another time). Now think about what will happen if your worries are realized. What if the hotel you are staying at turns out to be a dump – think about it- is that life-ending? Does a bad hotel ruin everything? Likely not. You could always go elsewhere or make the best of it. Life does not end because the hotel isn’t nice, it just is, what it is. Do this for each item. Once you have gotten your thoughts out of your head and realized that even the worst that could happen is not that bad, move on.
Plan For The Possibility
Whenever I go on vacation I used to become obsessed with the weather. Is it going to be hot, cold, rainy or windy? This obsession has not disappeared, however, the way I handle it has. Knowing myself the way only I do, I plan for the weather. We were just in Spain a month ago and I knew one thing about the weather. It never rains in Spain. Not only does it never rain, there has been a water ban for two years. Despite that, my mind said this, “crap, it is going to rain, I know it.” Unsurprisingly I was right, but, I was also ready. I had planned for rain (just in case). I had asked my Sister to bring rain ponchos and as the rain poured down we stayed dry and laughed. “Of course, it was raining, why wouldn’t it?”
Your Biggest Fear Has Happened
The reason most people worry is because of fear of the unknown. The “what ifs”. If you have a plan for the what-ifs there is nothing left to worry about. You have already thought of the worst thing that can happen and created a plan to deal with it. If the worst thing does happen you are ready. You have thought about the ramifications and have somewhat of a plan. I am not saying this will fix every worry, but, it can alleviate many of them.
Bedtime Routines
Are you a person who lays down at night and a million things go through your head? If you are, be ready. Keep a pen and paper by your bedside, jot down the things going through your head and an action plan for each item. “It might rain”, write down “pack an umbrella”. Take 5-10 minutes to jot everything down and then leave it. You have a plan, you are ready and it is time to sleep. Before going to bed lay out your clothes for the next day. If you need a coffee the moment you wake up set your coffee maker to have your coffee ready. Start your day calmy you will have a much better chance of your day staying that way. If you wake up in a panic it can only go downhill from there.
Create a Worry-Less Routine
I have one word for you- routine. If you are a constant worrier routine is your best friend. Do your best to take advantage of the things you can control. When you lay out your day it provides you with a sense of peace. Rather than worry about the maybes focus on the definitalies. You know what your days look like, get up, get dressed, drive to work etc. so plan for it. The more things you can control the happier you will be.
Get A Life Coach
If you have implemented the strategies above and are still in a constant state of worry it is time to get some additional support. Speak to your Doctor, perhaps a medication is required. Therapists can be a good resource to help you figure out why you are the way you are. Lastly (and what I think works best) hire a Life Coach. A Life Coach can help you create a plan, provide strategies and work with you until your worrying is a thing of the past. My goal is to help you “Live more and worry less.” If you would like to learn more about worry and anxiety you can read my article, “Understanding Anxiety.”